There comes a point in everyone’s life when he/she is faced with a multitude of daunting, unsurmountable issues that could very much change his/her way of life. This usually happens somewhere around one’s mid-age and pop-writers flippantly call this ‘The mid-life crisis’. Carefully considering the going-ons in my life hitherto and after hours of introspection, I realized that I am being plagued by a rather devious variant of this ‘mid-life crisis’. But I still have a healthy 30 more years to kill to pass my prime, so it’s not exactly mid-life. It’s the Quarter life crisis!
C’mon, I’m no philosopher to coin high-brow terms; I just ripped it off from ace-blogger Jiby chettan (who actually used to be my senior at school). 😉 His ‘Quarter life crisis’ set in when he was 25. It’s an existentialist angst about living the American dream. Jiby also echoes an identity crisis and speaks poignantly about hours of soul-searching, trying desperately to find the answer to the question of life. Despite well-paying jobs, he couldn’t find his real ‘calling’. But in the end, it was all for good, he muses. To quote Jiby:
“The crisis was good for me – it has given me dreams, it has given me a reason to work hard, it has made me strong. I don’t know about success, but I will survive. I will be happy.”
In a nutshell, Jiby didn’t actually find his solution, but he learnt to live with his crisis beaming all through. Which is precisely what I feel incapable of. Messed up academics, daily fights with parents, break ups, losing all my best friends to trivial matters; even a minor (<-understatement) tiff with the law… At times, I feel like pulling out every single strand of my already-thinning hair with all the stress! Possible solutions to problems end up worsening others. Probably, I’m not taking the right decisions and end up falling deeper into the pit with every step I take; I can’t possibly know. But I do know that each of these problems have a worst-case-scenario which could potentially rip my life into shreds.
Enough rants! As I’d mentioned in my earlier posts, blogging is my way to kill stress. I’m already feeling better and I think I should get back to studies. If rumours have their way, my Fourth Semester exams will commence on the Fifteenth of July, which itself is two months late! Even with my unquenching interest in my subject, Information Technology, I actually don’t know enough crap to fill the answer papers… Paradox, eh? Well, paradoxes are way of life for this quarter-life-crisis patient!
Dunno if I’ll be able to blog in July, but I’ll sure try. Keep visiting…
And do pray for me! I seriously need a LOT of divine intervention! 🙂