Confessions of a mediocre student

Before you read this post, ask the following questions to yourself:

Have you ever:

  • Watched five movies back-to-back?
  • Sat all day long, a book before you, gaping aimlessly at the fan?
  • Dreamt about certain poignant issues ranging from the meaning of life to chaos theory for hours on end?
  • Sat in front of the PC for forty eight hours straight?
  • Chatted on the phone for eight hours, non-stop?

    “Oh, duh! Part-of-a-teenager’s-life questions. Why AM I reading through this piece of shit?”

    Aw, C’mon. I can read your mind. It’s no telepathy; just common-sense. Well, some of you might’ve done at least one among these (or variations), at some point in your life, haven’t you? What’s so big, you think.

    Let me rephrase my question(s).

    Have you done all these, the day before your board/university exam?

    I have. Period.

    Did you just flinch/cock-up-an-eyebrow/use-the-F-word? No surprises again, that too was elementary. Unless, of course, you’re a slacker like me. If so, welcome to the club! You have company, my friend.

    I had a sunny side to my life, long back at school. At that time, I used to dutifully learn the day’s portions by rote, spending hours in front of the text; memorizing pages of info written in mostly-unintelligible lingo. But as time passed, as I grew into an ‘angry’ young man; I began to feel an off-key note among all this. What’s the bloody point? Typical teenager cynicism. An impressive performance in my tenth boards without much effort left me in fool’s paradise. Eventually, I developed a steady hate for written exams. By the time I passed twelfth (with a measly 82%, without studying a thing, again) and secured admission to GEC Barton Hill, the damage was more or less complete.

    First series exams. Okay, I did well for Maths, but scored pathetically for other papers: failing in one. Second series: Pass:fail = 7:2. Third series Pass:Fail 5:4. After every exam result, I’d cultivate a certain controlled-remorse, partly as a facade to shield parents’ wrath, partly to do well again. It would last maybe for a week, God forbid. Then came the University Exams with a month and a half long “Study” leave. I devised rather innovative ways to skip studies; reading non-fiction/fiction/periodicals/newspapers, watching movies et al. Not a SINGLE minute studying (even on the eve of the exam, so to speak)! Well, first year exams went by in a breeze. The results weren’t much shocking. Three f***ing backpapers for Physics, Chemistry and Electronics. Exactly, as I’d expected.

    Today, many-a-university (and hopefully, not many-a-backpaper: the results of my third semester exams are still in the pipeline) later, I stand as remorseless as ever after my first series in s4. Though I have faith in passing at least four papers this time, I doubt my study skills. It’s indeed been a while since I focussed my mind and learned something, academically speaking, that is. The sore point in the whole issue is the fits of anger that ensue within me when I see the sardonic glances of guys and gals, evidently dumber than myself, when they score 80%s at the universities! Ironically, I ignore all of them and move on with my uneventful life, choosing not to ‘work’ like them!

    Will I have a redemption? Hopefully. I’m trying Yoga and Meditation.

    To all those who’ve mocked me during my academic-lows:
    Yeah, I’ve decided to turn over a new leaf. Let this rant signal a new beginning!


    “When the world turns its BACK on you, you turn your BACK on the world!”

    Timon to Simba(The Lion King)

    The title of this post is borrowed from Guru Das’s article along similar lines in ‘The Loyolite 2005’.

    By hari

    A twenty-something support engineer, web developer, blogger and journalist who makes the web a better place for a living, at Automattic. Immensely passionate about WordPress! Also loves books, music, movies, and drinking hot cups of coffee on rainy evenings. Dreams of writing a book, someday.


    1. When hari shows the _|_ to u, i show it back _|_. Inna pidicho!

      Let this be the 1st comment! Baaki varunnundedey!

    2. Yeah, i’ve done all the things that you’ve asked the reader! Seems that you’ve developed this Fucking tendency to underrate your readers(or the ppl who did the mistake to type the fucking URL). Don’t do it for long, or els along with your few back papers, you can also add a few people who USED to read your CREATIONS :-).

      Coming to the blog, it was fucking awesome to go through the Confessions of a mediocre student, felt good that students still feel the same attitude of showing the _|_ to the guy who set the exam paper :P.

      PS:Don’t crib like Hari of 5.sum1 and tell like he tells Alok, that i’ve used a lot of FUCK words :).

      PS PS: I’d not like to see this comment deleted.

      PS PS PS: I’ve had 12 straight hours on the fone with “YOU-KNOW-WHO”.

      PS PS PS PS: Forgot what i’d thought to write originally, anyways thing would be same with a much more number of FUCK WORDS.

    3. @Abhi:
      BESTESTESTESTESTEST Comment I’ve ever got!

      Well, the _|__ wasn’t exactly to any reader; but to a few specific ones who’d showed me the _|__ before… 😀

      And, yeah. I know that post sounded way too ‘chori’. But when you’re badly fucked up, the things you write will naturally be so! And, you were right about the 5.someone thing. It’s high time I stopped cribbing!

      For the record: I’ll NEVER delete this comment. Period.

    4. hari,
      for a reading this quite a good post. but as i turn onto the practical side of things u have narrated, i feel u ought to turn a new leaf soon. i do appreciate ur nonchalant attitude but u must change it b4 u regret once.

      i m not being a grandma. but just felt like telling you, bcz i thot u were a guy who took all seriously esp studies. U r a guy of great caliber acc to my calculations – so use all that caliber and rise beyond my expectations in ur studies too as u have already done in other fields.

      maybe one day if u find enuf time to come n speak to me, so tat we can chat for sometime..i’ll just try to put u in the so-called proper path…hehe.

    5. @ miss small wonder:
      I got your point. Andyou’re not being a grandma when you say so… 😀 There’s no need to appreciate my non-chalent attitude. The truth is that I’ve lost my study skills and I need to change.

      HELP ME!!!

    6. I don’t know why u told ths as th BESTEST comment u’ve ever got. Come on many hav done btr n u giv th honours to somethin tht i scribbled n in which i forgot half of what i’d to tell u! Anyways i feel th best was what’s been given above ths comment. Th offer from someone to set u into th right path. Follow it if u feel its th right path. I’ve always been a strong believer that u don’t need awesome marks to be good in life. Always th guys who ace in studies end up with a mediocre life. Its th one’s who dared to defy conventions who reach th stars n shine down upon the world. Bt tht doesn’t mean u completely shun ur studies n show th finger to th world. On a personal note i believe it’s high time u stopped accumulating these back papers’ i’d say this with even more stress coz u’ve equalled my record of 3 backs in B Tech. So stop right there buddy.

    7. @Abhi:
      True, Miss Small Wonder showed empathy and proactively offered help. She’s a GREAT person, and indeed as great a wonder. I really appreciate her effort.

      But, I couldn’t help laughing out loud reading your comment!! That’s why I said it was the ‘BESTESTESTEST’! :p

      A whole lot of THANKS to Abhi AND especially to Miss Small Wonder for your love, care and concern in poor ol’ me! 😀

    8. da….i remember writin u a comment……but somehow….it hasnt come…… here goes again

      I agree to abhi on tat u dont need to top yo b the best…….esp in todays world wer attitude rules over academics……u jus need to have the cut off marks….but u must ve tat.and ofcourse som talkin skills and smartness …m sure u ve all tat…and u r loads creative…as it is said….for creativity…u ll ve to break rules…jus make sure u r not caught..
      wanted to mention jus one thing……” But as time passed, as I grew into an ‘angry’ young man”;…hi hi…tat was a real joke….

    9. @ Spartan:
      Well buddy, you’ve a point there. But, you need to score the bare minimum of ‘cut-off’ nah? 🙁

      I need to step up my studies.

    10. hehe.. seeing a lot of unparliamentary language here.. yea ive tried out some of this stuff before some xams.. but not all.. scores do matter to me after all..

      By the way Deepak R sir from ur college is in NITC now.. he helped us organise FOSSMeet.. he’s a great blogger too, i went thru it..

      I see u ppl mustb having a gr8 blogging culture at Barton Hill.. Keep it up..

    11. @ hari:
      Frustration often gives way to unparliamentary language. The fact that you’re an NITian and your fabulous GATE score are enough testimony to your intellectual prowess and study skills. I’m not that intelligent (in the classic sense of the word), though! 😛

      And, yeah! I missed FOSSMeet thanks to a hurriedly-organized Class-tour which clashed with the dates. 🙁 Deepak Sir is one cool guy! I’m a great fan of his.

    12. The points of view were just identical to that of mine, but my classmates never made those sardonic looks or did the so called cynical acts at me because 1)few always found happiness in the 75+ they got and didn’t bother to ask about others.
      2)few didn’t want to make themselves unhappy by knowing the comparitively better marks of me and the rest are like me:the ‘come what may guys’.

      keep vomiting your emotions out.i really enjoy reading things with an autobio touch.

    13. @ Sreehari chettan:
      Well, you have good marks to boast of, I don’t! 🙁

      But someday, I’ll have my redemption; mind it!! 🙂

    14. No gain without pain…it’s as simple as that mate.

      U obviously are not spending enough time studying, rather u focus on other activities that interest u. Nothing wrong wit tat but with ure talent u can comfortably score 75+ by just spending a little more time on studying. No need for wholesale change.

      Remember u may have everything to succeed in another field but rght now u are studying engg. and make sure the mark list will not become a blot in ure resume.

      You are not a mediocre student because you are but just because you choose to be so.

      Anyways i admire ure blog and enjoyed ure posts. Keep up the good work!!!!

    15. @jithinferrari:
      True. 🙁 I need to shift my focus and move on to do things more productive. Must start studying!!

      And yeah. You’re right about how being a mediocre student was my choice. It was, albeit, and inadvertant one. 🙁

      Thanks anyway. You too have a great blog out there! 🙂

    Leave a Reply

    This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.