I took a short break sometime back, promising that there wouldn’t be any more breaks.
Well, promises are made to be broken. 🙂
Breaking promises isn’t new to me. I’ve broken quite a lot of them. On an average, I’ve broken at least half of all promises I’ve made. And that’s not something I’m proud of – even though I might make it seem this way.
Now, that’s another topic of discussion altogether.
Ah yes, the ‘break’. As you might’ve guessed or inferred, I broke the promise again.
I put an abrupt end to blogging.
But when you stop, or when you leave, there ought to be a return. Every coin has its flip side, every action has its opposite. Likewise, every ‘break’ has its return – and here I am.
I’ve broken another promise, but I’ve returned – for good (hopefully).
If I’d made the statement that I’d blog regularly for good one month back (err… I actually did that, didn’t I?) – I would’ve said it with conviction. I’ve always had this haughty voice in my head, an optimistic haughty voice, which commands my actions. And that voice chanted those words to me – I merely reproduced them. I was so sure of myself. I knew I was unstoppable. I knew ideas would come flowing.
I was arrogant.
Well, ideas didn’t exactly come flowing. Alright, that would be tall – there were ideas. All I had to do was to just sit and type. But I procrastinated the job. I procrastinated it for one month, 15 days and six hours. As for every instance of my procrastination, I had reasons to justify myself. I always had reasons – some true, some fake. In this case, the reasons were genuine. The new job (as some of you may know, I work for a web portal these days – more on that coming later), didn’t give me a lot of time for myself. Not that I was too busy or anything. But I used the excuse to procrastinate, on and on. I either killed post ideas or either shelved them. Blog posts continued to exist(?) as carcasses in my mind’s cold storage.
Now, as I return to my eternal love – my blog, I can’t bring them all back to life. I’m no witch-doctor. All I can do is to try.
‘Try’. It’s a funny word. A ‘corporate trainer’ I interviewed the other day was telling me that ‘trying’ is the most futile thing ever. You either do, or you don’t. You do not try, he said.
Still, all I can do is ‘try’. I can coax my mind to think, I can pump words into my fingers, I can pour thoughts from my mind into the greyish-calm of this WordPress Editor. I’m trying. I shall continue to try – as long as my heart pumps blood to my mind…
It’s official, folks. I chose the red pill, is back in the reckoning. 🙂
The New Job
I didn’t exactly want to beat the drums about the new job – but yeah, on second thoughts…
You all know my predilection for being prolific. Sadly, the new job calls for conciseness.
I joined Yentha.com as a Reporter, on August 4th, 2010. For those who don’t know Yentha – it’s a one stop source for all information on the city of Trivandrum. News, views, articles, business listings, life… you name it, we have it. 🙂 It’s been an eventful couple of months. I shall speak in detail about all that in the next post.
Wait for it. 🙂
I’m here to stay. Not to ‘break’. 🙂